Fear.

                                                            (Image is from a google search)

 

I've never thought that I was bound by fear.  I never gave fear a second thought. I am courageous, very spontaneous, and I am not faint at heart.  However, I was struck by fear.  Fear of the unknown.  I started thinking about what if I got what I prayed for.  What would it require of me.  Am I willing to pay the cost of my request?? This thought left my  heart fluttering. If the Mr. turned his heart to God and lead this family in the way of the Lord, what would that require of me.  Will he see my imperfections as a wife?  Will he see how much I want my own way.  Will he desire to have a more biblical marriage?  Will he care about my appearance?  My mind went racing, I couldn't keep up!!! I had to calm myself.  The Holy Spirit had to calm me.  I needed His embrace.  I lost control for a moment in time.  As I allowed the Spirit to minister to me, He helped me refocus my attention.  How could I worry about my cost when someones salvation was at stake.  He then reminded me that a saved man loves his wife as Christ loves the church.  A saved man puts God and his wife before he puts himself.  A saved man has his families best interest at heart.  What am I worried about?? What does a saved women do for her husband?? She does the same.  She offers unconditional respect, she honors her man, she is submitted. This requires something of me.  However, I know that I CAN do all things through Christ that strengthen me!!! God has not given me a spirit of fear, but of POWER, LOVE and a SOUND mind.  I will continue to pray and diligently seek the Father for my family.  However, I will open up and allow God to continue to mold me into the wife that he meant for me to be.