Latkes

Every year since we've moved to Memphis we celebrate Hanukkah with friends. My dear friend Miriam makes the best latkes ever! The other food is amazing too. We are not Jewish but we do enjoy celebrating biblical holidays. I mean our Savoir was Jewish. So I guess that makes it alright. I like to take what learn from this celebration and point it all back to Jesus. 

 We're the most eclectic group of friends. We all come celebrating something different but the love shared among us all is the same.  I wouldn't change a thing. 

The kids playing dreidel.

 

Life choices.

When we started down this path of becoming local missionaries my mind couldn't fully comprehend the depth of service needed. Living life with people is truly loving your neighbor as you love yourself. So far I've experienced joy of babies being born, anger that something was stolen, concern for children without, selflessness as I put other people's need before my own. Today however I'm feeling sadness and grief as a sweet young mother has to make the decision to take her baby off of life support. This young lady has shown so much strength through this all. She birth 2 babies, cared for them both for 6 weeks and now making a hard decision for one. I can't imagine what she feels, my heart aches for this family.

This is the sister we're helping care for while the family is at the hospital with the other. Every time I see her face, I pray for life. Life will be different growing up without her twin.

I'm all in my feelings #nooneshouldeverseethiskindofpicture

This is me slinging sweet Makayla.

Baby it's cold outside!

Hello everybody!! This has been one crazy week. We have officially been without heat, hot water or a stove for a week and 2 days. Right after thanksgiving I kept smelling gas in the house. I called the electric company and they confirmed a leak and turned the gas off. We've spent our days dealing with the plumber, code enforcement and the electric company. Let's just say they are ALL on their own time schedule. I never thought I would be so ready for my stove back. I'm just thanking God because I know the we were protected from something that he saw. I'm trying hard not to complain and see the beauty in this all. 

Yesterday at church(house church)we had an emergency. Right as I was pulling up the ambulance was right behind me. Much to my surprise they were going to where we were going. Before I could get to the door someone came out to fill me in. The twin to this sweet baby girl stopped breathing. She's in ICU at the children's hospital right now. Please keep her in your prayers. I felt very honored that the family called and asked if I would keep the well twin while they are there supporting the mom. I love babies and I was glad to help! 

I'm getting older!

Today was such a sweet day! Today at "house church" we had a wonderful time in the word and fellowship! Our sweet Tess (in the picture with me) is leaving to spend time with family before heading to Ethopia. I will surely miss her. We had a Thanksgiving meal,yummy! Our friends also presented us with a cookie cake, it's my birthday! It was wonderful sharing my day with such a great group of people. I admire the sweet people serving in Orange Mound, I feel so blessed to have them in my life. My life is changing forever !

Preparing to serve.

The lady on the left is a sweet, sweet young lady that's been serving in Orange Mound. She's getting ready to serve in Ethopia in a few weeks. She'll be leaving Memphis in less than two weeks to spend time with her family before serving overseas. She's going to help school some of the missionary children! I'm so excited about her journey. Who knew that in just a few months of serving with her, I would miss her so much. What I'm learning on this journey is that ALL hands must be on deck. When one person is gone we notice it. I'm praying for her!

 

I'm reading this book: 

I'm preparing my heart for the journey that awaits us. It's exciting but serious. I understand (or perhaps I don't) the gravity of what we're being called to do.  We are sacrificing some of our own comforts for bringing hope to those who need it most. I don't have all the answer or all the money to fix very real needs. What I'm bringing to the table is Christ, Christ alone. (Well maybe a hug and a smile) My mom recently told me that she always knew I would be a missionary. She said I've had a heart for missions since I was little. I never knew she thought that. I'm so glad to have the support of my parents! God is good and I'm so thankful!

I voted!

We finished school early today so that I could go out and vote! The lines were not long. Yay me!!! No lines!!! 

If you've managed to keep up with this blog and seasons of drought then you know my marriage is less than smooth. We are taking it one second at a time literally!! Today was heated of course as we (mainly him) discussed our thoughts about the election. I'm perfectly fine with agreeing to disagree but some subjects like politics, religion and race relations bring out "THE BEAST" in people. Well it was no different in our home this morning!! The beast was unleashed, good thing I was ready for battle this morning!! God prepared me to be ready for disengagement. Sometimes that's really hard, but not today! I walked away with my peace and joy intact! The Lord keeps reminding me and I'm (slowly) realizing that this battle is not against flesh and blood......

Happy Voting and may the peace of God rest in your home, your city, and our nation!!!!

Duggar Watch Party!!!!

So it's no secret, I love The Duggars! I just found out that I'm in a community with fellow Duggar lovers. Tonight we had a watch party. The girls got all fancy, we had petit fours, and sparkling grape juice! It was so much fun. We actually thought tonight was the wedding but we're a week early. We called tonight the rehearsal dinner. Next week will be even better as we watch the wedding. I really enjoy that this is something I can watch with my children. 

My dad had a bad report, but God!!!!

Friday my dad had to be rushed to the hospital due to his kidneys failing. We called all the prayer warriors and God moved! Today the doctor came in and said he will be dismissed tomorrow because his kidneys have improved!! He's seriously shouting praises to the rooftop in the hospital! They sent the nurse in because he was sooo loud. He said, "God is to good not to praise Him"! We are so thankful. God is so good. Thank you Lord for healing my dad! 

Time to say good-bye

Well folks, our time is winding down in Orange Mound for now. We have had a blast. This week has given me a renewed hope in God for my dreams, my marriage and direction for this family. I'm not sure how this path will unfold but I'm certain  God's is in control. 

I wish I was better at taking pictures because last night we hosted a dinner party. We invited our friends and other people that are living in missional communities. We wanted our friends and family to have the opportunity to ask questions about this life style.  The night was perfect. Jason grilled and I had a fiesta going on in the inside. We even brought over our fire pit. It was nice to have the people we love over to experience just a glimpse of our life here over the last week! We're pretty sure what our decision will be!!!!

Hands and feet of Christ....

This could be our new home! Many of you know we are prayerfully considering becoming part of a missional community. We have the opportunity to serve and live in one of the most under served communities in our city. Most would say it's one of the most dangerous communities too. I use to be scared to drive through this neighborhood. It wasn't until I started spending time with the people in this community that I realized that we are more alike than different. I've learned so much from them. I'm sure they're helping me more than I help them. When I look at them I now see that they were created by the same Savior  that created me. I see them as God's masterpiece. We all need Him. God is not just for the rich, educated, well off, middle class, two parent home and etc. He is for us all. Please pray for our family!

Summer Time.....

It has only been raining for 2 weeks, so over the rain!!! Yesterday was our first day without rain. Hello Mr. Sun I'm so happy to see you.

This is what I've been up to!!! Making hats for my friends. The color combinations are endless. 

Ignore the floor! Jayla (teenager) made her first pair of pants using a pattern. She was excited with end result. I (gasp) let her wear them to church. I even held back from any critiques! I'm growing.

Spring time blues

It's officially spring, I couldn't be more thrilled about the warmer weather.  I am so excited about wearing my flip flops outside (I wear them year round in the house).  The flowers and trees are starting to bloom.  I am seriously in love with this time of year.  However, with this time of year comes this anxious-ness that over takes me.  I am SOOOO very ready to wrap of the school year.  I am tired of waking up at the crack of dawn and going to bed well after everyone else.  I don't want to do another project.  My cheesy desire to have the kids in freshly ironed clothes is LONG gone. I don't even double check their lunch to make sure it's balanced.  The spring makes me LONG for lazy days. I am looking forward to the days of staying in my pj's until ........, I want to enjoy my babies instead of rushing them out of the house (all of them are not homeschooled), I just want to be.  I don't like that all of my days are held hostage to my to-do list.  I just want to wake-up taking in God's beauty (for as long as my heart desires). 

The joy of the Lord is my strength!!

Spring Break

This has been an exciting spring break.  God has made another impression on my heart.  I was able to spend a few days away in the Smoky Mountains with my family (including the "Mr").  I was super thrilled that he joined us, I was terrified to drive up the mountains alone. I believe this trip was something that our family needed.  We were not alone, my sister (and family), and 2 of my cousins and their families joined us.  There were 20 of us in all.  We laughed, played games, and gave my cousin a surprise birthday party.
The "Mr" took us on a caravan through the mountains.  He drove us as far as motor vehicles could go.  I was speechless at God's majesty.  I seriously was in tears taking it all in.  God is an artist, I am sure that's where I get all my creative abilities (lol)!

This was us at the top of a mountain, the view was amazing! We could see all the way to North Carolina.

I had a lot of good moments.  Seriously, too many to name.  However, I want to write about my favorite memory on the trip.  The last night of the trip was very festive, we sent all the children to "chill out" earlier than usual.  The adults were up fellowshipping and doing general stuff.  Eventually I went to bed and THEN IT HAPPENED!! The "Mr." came in after spending time alone with himself, nature and God.  When he came in he wanted to PRAY!!! I was so thrilled.  That was my favorite moment.  I didn't initiate the prayer, I didn't ask him to pray.  God led him to me to pray!!
I will never forget that moment.
When I am discouraged, tired, and weary from this journey I will remember the night he came to pray.  Just when I am at the end of my rope with this all, God extends the rope! I can't not do this without God.

Trust (just an update)

This journey learning to trust God more has been just that, a journey.  I have turned so many things over to God.  These are things that should have been at his feet to stay already.  However, learning to trust means being okay with leaving them there.  Freedom is a good word to describe just how I feel about letting go of these things.  Situations have happened that have been totally out of my control, I've handled them better than ever before.  That alone is so humbling.  He cares about me. When I say that out loud it makes me cry.  God cares about me. Little me.  The  unworthy me. The fail often me. Long way to go me.  Wow!!! It doesn't get better than that.
I've been praying for the "Mr.", my children, friends, family, the body of Christ, and so many other things.  The more I dig in, the more He reveals himself to me.  The more I am in His word, the more equipped I am to run the course.  The more I see myself as Christ sees me, the more aware I am of his plans for me. 
I want to encourage anyone that is struggling in their marriage to continue to pray without ceasing.  I recently received unexpected news.  I was shaken.  Upon receiving the news my focus shifted from God to the problem.  I was sinking and no longer walking on water.  Just like that God used "The Mr." to minister to me.  He spoke the Word of God over me. Yes, the unbelieving spouse that I've been praying for spoke God's word over me.  He encouraged me in a way that only God could do through him.  I believe in miracles.

Dreams coming true!

I've mentioned several times that I wanted to have a children's clothes boutique. Guess what? It's starting to manifest! I've named my business Lily's boutique, after my sweet and sassy Lily who passed away. Here are a few pictures of my work! Yippee, I'm so excited.

Let them see you!

When it comes to worshiping God, I am a HUGE cry baby!! Right now the song that has me a mess in the car is, Let Them See You.  This song takes me to that place! This song is my heart's cry.  I want people to see Jesus when they see me.  If people saw Ester they would see a mess!! I am a mess without HIM!! I want to live a life totally surrendered to my Father God.  I fail daily  in some area of my life.  Sometimes I eat the wrong food, I'm not patient with the people I love, my thoughts are NOT pure (if you knew have the things that I thought), and other times I am not a good steward over my blessings.  The list could go on, but God see me differently! He sees me in His image.  He see His creation.  I am His masterpiece.  He knows ALL of my shortcomings and He still LAVISHES His love on me. Lord, let them see you.......

Saying NO is so HARD!!

I am sure this could apply to so many things but I am refering to telling my children "NO".  It's easier to some things than others.  It's so hard for me to explain to my children why "we" (me) choose not to watch certain things on TV and listen to certain music.  Before you start giving me the side eye, we don't just listen to Christian music or Christian programming.  However, I am very concerned about the lyrics of a song  and the message of the program.  I do care if it has witchcraft (spells, magic, etc), teenage dating, rebellious children, and etc! I know there are arguments that this is just entertainment.  This could be true, but the Bible tells us to guard our hearts with diligence.  We never know the seeds being planted.  Satan is real! He will use whatever innocent tactics he can to lure us and our children in.  I will not say what is right or wrong.  I can only say it's my conviction and I must say "NO"!  It can be frustrating for them and me! There are times when nothings on they can watch.  I hate it for them.  The can't yet reason why Disney channel is made for children and yet something might be questionable.  They can't understand why other Christian families from church are allowed to watch and listen to certain things.  They don't like the feeling at school when they can't join in the latest episode talk.  It hurts but what would hurt more is not defending my faith and having to answer to God about that. 
My dear children, I do love you.  I wish love always meant warm and fuzzy, but it doesn't. I wish more people felt the same way, but they don't.  I hate that the only shows are baby shows, but they are safe.  You are a precious gift from God.  The world will be waiting on you to try to impose their views on you.  The world can't wait to make you feel like you missed out.  You will have plenty (a lifetime) of fighting for your faith and beliefs.  Right now is your training ground, this is preparation!  The world might not play nice.  You have to practice now!
Love,
MOM

Baby Goodness

I really want to jump into the world of boutique children's clothes. I dressed my little ones in them and I just think they are so cute. So when I have extra time I will invest in my little dream. Here's my first attempt! I also used my Christmas money to put an embroidery machine in the lay-a-way! I am so excited!!! 

Birthday Party fun!!

There is no secret, this girl loves a good party!  I secretly look for occasions to throw a get together! Well, in my mission to minister to the Mr. I decided to throw him a birthday party. He recently told me that he never had a birthday party growing up!! What?? How can that be?? How could I not know that? Well the kids helped me plan a modest affair for him. He was so grateful! He really liked all the attention. He never knew how great it felt having friends over to celebrate life! I prayed that this would be a blessing. I prayed the impact would reach beyond my humanly eyes. I'm expecting fruit that I know only God can produce!

Here are my friends and I posing in a photo booth created by my crafty daughter. Props and all!

Birthday boy and sister crafty!!

Our hot dog bar! Which was a fun and easy food idea!

I wish I took better pics but I was so busy chatting I forgot!

We decorated the ceiling too! 

We are entering birthday season in our house. It my second favorite season with Christmas being the first. Who doesn't love cake and friends?

Breath of fresh air

You may know that I homeschool my oldest daughter. She's quite an amazing kid ( I know every parent thinks that)! Yesterday we watched a video thats been floating around of a 13 year old homeschool boy. This video truly inspired us to adjust our homeschooling method. So this little lady

Will be learning and interning at all the places she has special interest. I'm amazed that there are so many people willing to share their skill with my sweet girl!

Trust!!

Trust is just one if those words that always causes me to pause. Like I said in a previous post, I was lot scared that it was going to be my word for the year.  I know that God will provide many opportunities to TRUST him this year, SCARY!!! He likes to put us to the test (mainly because he will  get the glory) when we trust him.  I mean it really sounds easy, trust in God who has already declared your victory. Who would think twice with a promise like that? Me. 
Don't get me wrong, I trust God (with some things), I also truly believe he can do anything He chooses to do, I get that nothing is to hard for him.  I don't doubt that he can do his part.  I do question my ability to take the first blind step. Yikes!! I am a planner, I like to know, I want to be in the loop. Ok, ok.... This might fall under the CONTROL spectrum. I do like to have a little control.  Funny how I think I'm in control when this is ALL His plan. Lord, let your will be done in my life.  I want to be totally surrendered to my daddy God.  I understand that totally surrendering starts with trusting God in every area of my life. (Even my wildest dreams)

I picked a word!!

Well I should say God picked our word!! Our word for this year will be TRUST! To be honest this word scares me a lot!! 

Happy New Year!

I'm so excited about this year and all that it may bring! 

I have a lot friends that choose a word to focus on all year as a family. I think that's a great idea and I'm praying over several words. I even asked the kiddos to pray about our family word. There are so many  words that would be good! But I'll wait on God!

I don't really make resolutions but we always survey our year and talk about what went well and improvements we need to make personally and as a family.

All I can say is that I'm expecting a great year , I can't wait to see what God has up his sleeve!