Fired!

I should have seen it coming! My oncologist decided after our "talk" yesterday, that we were not a good fit. I was prepared for him not to stay on the case, but he was so harsh. He was not willing to hear me out. I thought all doctors knew that if you don't build trust with the patient you won't get very far. I had to sign several things acknowledging our separation. 

It was so unsettling how quick he jumped to this. He didn't even attempt to get a better understanding. Little things like that chip away at my faith in healthcare. Instead of being angry I used it as a catalyst to pray for doctors, their teams and other healthcare workers. In the mean time I have scheduled appointments with 2 other oncologist. I don't know what my hope is for either of those appointments. Maybe, I  just one of them to listen and try to understand my point (and be okay with disagreeing). I know the standard protocol is to offer chemo radiation therapy. It would take a divine intervention to get me to that point. I don't want to die now but I'm not afraid of death either. Oh death where is your sting.....

I'm thankful for this sweet notebook my friend put together for me:

It has a few pages of decorative scriptures. It's so thoughtful. I'm thankful that the Elder (and his wife) of my house church are so invested in my family and my health. I'm experiencing community in a new way. God knew what I needed. I'm thankful for blessings that keep coming in my mailbox. I have needed every card, gift card, coupon, and word of encouragement.