Spring time blues

It's officially spring, I couldn't be more thrilled about the warmer weather.  I am so excited about wearing my flip flops outside (I wear them year round in the house).  The flowers and trees are starting to bloom.  I am seriously in love with this time of year.  However, with this time of year comes this anxious-ness that over takes me.  I am SOOOO very ready to wrap of the school year.  I am tired of waking up at the crack of dawn and going to bed well after everyone else.  I don't want to do another project.  My cheesy desire to have the kids in freshly ironed clothes is LONG gone. I don't even double check their lunch to make sure it's balanced.  The spring makes me LONG for lazy days. I am looking forward to the days of staying in my pj's until ........, I want to enjoy my babies instead of rushing them out of the house (all of them are not homeschooled), I just want to be.  I don't like that all of my days are held hostage to my to-do list.  I just want to wake-up taking in God's beauty (for as long as my heart desires). 

The joy of the Lord is my strength!!

Spring Break

This has been an exciting spring break.  God has made another impression on my heart.  I was able to spend a few days away in the Smoky Mountains with my family (including the "Mr").  I was super thrilled that he joined us, I was terrified to drive up the mountains alone. I believe this trip was something that our family needed.  We were not alone, my sister (and family), and 2 of my cousins and their families joined us.  There were 20 of us in all.  We laughed, played games, and gave my cousin a surprise birthday party.
The "Mr" took us on a caravan through the mountains.  He drove us as far as motor vehicles could go.  I was speechless at God's majesty.  I seriously was in tears taking it all in.  God is an artist, I am sure that's where I get all my creative abilities (lol)!

This was us at the top of a mountain, the view was amazing! We could see all the way to North Carolina.

I had a lot of good moments.  Seriously, too many to name.  However, I want to write about my favorite memory on the trip.  The last night of the trip was very festive, we sent all the children to "chill out" earlier than usual.  The adults were up fellowshipping and doing general stuff.  Eventually I went to bed and THEN IT HAPPENED!! The "Mr." came in after spending time alone with himself, nature and God.  When he came in he wanted to PRAY!!! I was so thrilled.  That was my favorite moment.  I didn't initiate the prayer, I didn't ask him to pray.  God led him to me to pray!!
I will never forget that moment.
When I am discouraged, tired, and weary from this journey I will remember the night he came to pray.  Just when I am at the end of my rope with this all, God extends the rope! I can't not do this without God.

Trust (just an update)

This journey learning to trust God more has been just that, a journey.  I have turned so many things over to God.  These are things that should have been at his feet to stay already.  However, learning to trust means being okay with leaving them there.  Freedom is a good word to describe just how I feel about letting go of these things.  Situations have happened that have been totally out of my control, I've handled them better than ever before.  That alone is so humbling.  He cares about me. When I say that out loud it makes me cry.  God cares about me. Little me.  The  unworthy me. The fail often me. Long way to go me.  Wow!!! It doesn't get better than that.
I've been praying for the "Mr.", my children, friends, family, the body of Christ, and so many other things.  The more I dig in, the more He reveals himself to me.  The more I am in His word, the more equipped I am to run the course.  The more I see myself as Christ sees me, the more aware I am of his plans for me. 
I want to encourage anyone that is struggling in their marriage to continue to pray without ceasing.  I recently received unexpected news.  I was shaken.  Upon receiving the news my focus shifted from God to the problem.  I was sinking and no longer walking on water.  Just like that God used "The Mr." to minister to me.  He spoke the Word of God over me. Yes, the unbelieving spouse that I've been praying for spoke God's word over me.  He encouraged me in a way that only God could do through him.  I believe in miracles.